The Freshmen
by beautifuldisaster12
Summary: Blair begins her first year at NYU. But not everything is working out the way she hoped. During a dark time, she turns to the last person she'd ever thought she'd need. Dan. But is our Queen manipulator being played by someone else?
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

_Gossip Girl here. Your one and only source into Manhattans elite. _

_The long hot days of summer are coming to a close, and leaving me with a thirst for Gossip. The end of the school saw some of my blog's regular characters conquer their high school dramas, and take their first grown up steps. For most, these steps have guided them outside their penthouses as they move from Egyptian cotton sheeted king size beds, into bunks and shared enclosed dorm rooms. _

_Even our resident lonely boy may find the NYU dorm rooms' too confined. Rumour has it he spent the summer enjoying breakfast at the Van Der Woodsen's penthouse, as the Rufus Humphreys and Lilly Van Der Woodsen prepare for their wedding in the New Year. It seems my branding of lonely Boy as an 'insider,' was not out of line, he may have lost Serena as a girlfriend, but gained her as a step-sister instead. Who says you can't stay in touch with an ex?_

_Speaking of Serena, she has finally returned from Europe, only to pack her bags again and head for Brown. Her attempt to locate her father proved a dead end but not all was lost. While she did not gain a daddy, word has it that she did return with a boyfriend. Looks like Carter and Serena have relit a flame which was once thought long gone. Hmmmm....wonder how step-brother Dan feels about said match up?_

_Europe proved lucky for more than one couple. Nate and Vanessa came back from their backpacking trip holding hands and each other's hearts. Looks like they're planning on giving the relationship another go as they head to different Colleges. Here's hoping....._

_But not all of us are destined for lecture halls and dorm rooms, Chuck Bass has decided to forego college and take over his father's company. His absent from any recent blogs suggest that this once rebel party boy has traded party and late night booty calls for business meetings and love. Looks like our star crossed lovers Blair and Chuck have spent the summer blissfully lost in one another. After so much heart ache, the two finally seem destined to be together. And with Blair staying in the city while she attends NYU, it seems their good luck is here to say....or is it?_

_With all off St Jude's and Constance's seniors moved on, does that mean the high school world is at peace? Think again. Seems Lil J has taken up roles of Upper East Side girl and queen bee. Will she fill Blair's manolos? Only time will tell...._

_Send me the details, because while Manhattan seems at peace for now, my bet is it won't be long before someone stirs the pot..._

_Until then, you know you love me._

_Xoxo_

_Gossip Girl._

'I don't really understand what all the fuss is about,' Lilly muttered as Rufus and Dan roll their eyes at one another, 'I mean how hard is it to make waffles? I wish you'd let me try.'

Rufus opened the waffle iron and flipped the freshly cooked waffle onto Lilly's plate.

'I'll tell ya what Lil's, tomorrow you get your own personal lesson in waffle making 101,' he said with a wink, 'it just today is Dan's last breakfast before we ship him off to NYU. I want this morning to be perfect for him.'

'It's true Lilly,' Dan added, 'I'm so stressed this morning that I couldn't handle pretending to like your half baked mushy waffles. Not that they'd be bad –uh, they'd probably be fine, it's –uh just that I'm so use to Dad's waffles, and y'know, his an artist in everything he does, I mean I know you were a photographer too but...'

'Thank you Daniel, you can breathe again,' Lilly cut him off quickly, 'you're probably right. My waffles are no match for your fathers, yet. '

'Yet?' Rufus raised an eyebrow.

'That's right, when Dan returns for a visit, I'm challenging you to a waffle cook off,' Lilly said, 'hopefully that will convince you to come home sooner rather than later.'

Dan smiled politely. He was deeply touched by Lily's effort to turn the penthouse into a home for the Humphreys. She had been polite, supportive and willing to incorporate the Humphrey's life style into her own. If he had to have a step mom then no one was better than Lily. However, he wasn't too keen on referring to the Upper East Side as 'home.' He hated seeing the loft empty and bare. He hated watching all the old furniture being sold. He wasn't particular fond of the penthouse. It was nice, sure but it just wasn't _him. _And of course, the penthouse was made even more uncomfortable with the presence of his step-sister-to-be. Also known as his ex-girlfriend. He had only had to endure three days of the uncomfortableness before Serena whisked herself off to Brown, but it was enough to make dread the his first break from college when he would be forced to spend the holidays with her. Undoubtedly Carter would be joining them too. Serena had been thoughtful enough to refrain from having Carter over, which Dan appreciated. However, it would only be a matter of time before he would cross paths with the two of them. It wasn't that he wanted Serena back, that relationship was done. However, seeing any ex and their new love is undoubtedly uncomfortable and Dan did not want to have to endure that social awkwardness in his own home.

'Well, thank-you Lily,' Dan replied, and in remembering how much this relationship meant to his father, he added, 'but I really already have enough reasons to return home.'

Rufus smiled at Dan appreciatively, then glanced at his watch, 'oh son, we better get a move on, got to get you settled in to your dorm.'

'Oh yes, yes,' Lily exclaimed standing to say goodbye, 'now Daniel, you look after yourself ok?'

'I will Lily,' Dan replied, kissing his stepmother on the cheek farewell, 'anyways I'm right up town.'

As Dan grabbed the final of his bags and stepped outside the building's entrance he felt like he could finally breathe. He was free. No more Upper East side. No more socially awkward situations. No more drama. No more gossip. He was Dan Humphrey of New York University. Dan smiled as he approached his fresh start.

However, somewhere else in New York saw one NYU student holding her breath with impatience. Today was supposed to be her day. She was leaving her luxurious penthouse and about to embark on a new chapter in her life. However, her day so far had consisted of her waiting impatiently on her bed while Chuck answered the hundreds of calls that flooded his blackberry. He'd promised her that he'd have the day off so that he could focus on getting her settled in her dorm. Blair had visualised this moment all summer. She had pictured waking up next to Chuck in her room, and having a farewell breakfast with her mother, Cyrus and of course Dorota. Then, the removalist would come and her and Chuck would take the limo to the dorm, while the movers and assistance her mother hire to organise her dorm room would settle her in. Then her and Chuck would spend the afternoon taking a walking tour of the campus, before a romantic dinner together.

Her plan had failed before the morning had even begun. Chuck failed to stay the night due to a late night business dinner and then missed breakfast. He had been at Blair's for 20 minutes and 19 of those minutes had been on the phone. Blair loved Chuck. She even loved the new and improved Chuck, whose partying ways had simmered down to almost non-existent. She loved the way he spoiled her with theatre shows and jewellery. Designer handbags and manolos. However she'd trade all his riches for a few extra moments each day with him. She couldn't ask him to cut back on work though; it was his father's business. But Chucked work as though he thought his father was somehow still able to remind him of what a disappointment he was and fire him. She just wish he'd relax and return to the youthful and fun loving man he once was. The man who'd come back from Europe to confess his love for her. The man whose passion for her led him to acts that she could still not recognise as comprehendible. She missed being the prey he hunted. She missed the fire in their relationship. That was the thing with fire, sooner or later it has to die out, and all that remains is ashes.

'I'm sorry, I'm sorry,' Chuck crossed the room and place a soft kiss on the edge of Blair's jaw.

'What was that about,' Blair asked, keeping her tone emotionless.

'Work stuff, client in crisis, meeting needed to be push up to tonight.'

'Tonight?' Blair's voiced turned to a whimper, would she now not even have a celebratory dinner?

'Yes tonight,' Chuck whispered looking across the room as he sat down next to her.

'Chuck,' Blair began.

'Of course, I told them that I'd already sacrificed this morning, your morning due to work, and that the meeting could wait, but your celebratory dinner couldn't,' Chuck turned to her, his crooked smile causing her anger to melt away, 'I'm sorry about his morning, let me make it up to you.'

'Fine,' Blair gave in to him, 'You can start making it up to me tonight.'

'I was hoping now,' Chuck pulled a small box from his pocket and placed it on the bed between them, 'a gift. To remind you how proud I am of how far you've come.'

'How far I've fallen, you mean. If you recall I was supposed to head for Yale,' Blair couldn't help but feel the disappointment of losing her dream wash over her again.

'Yes, I remember,' Chuck almost winced as he thought about watching Blair sink so low at then end of the school year, 'but you pulled yourself up. That's something you can be proud of Blair.'

'When you get so wise,' Blair smiled.

'Well, I had to step it up. I am dating a college girl now you know?' Chuck leant in and the two kissed.

Blair couldn't even remember why she was so upset before. This was Chuck, she loved him. And he loved her. They had both come so far in this past year. _You just have to get use to being in the relationship, instead of scheming ways on how to obtain it, _she told herself.

'Open the box,' Chuck urge.

Inside sat a silver chain, with a heart shaped pendent on the end, encrusted with silver diamonds.

'Chuck,' she breathed.

'You can thank me tonight,' Chuck winked.

Blair laughed as Chuck place the necklace around her neck.

_Our fire is definitely still burning, _Blair thought as she pulled Chuck close for a passionate kiss.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2.**

'22, 23....aha! 24!' Rufus claimed as he reached for the wooden door, 'you excited to see your new place son?'

Dan rolled his eyes, 'Open the door Dad,' he sighed.

'You won't even let me have a dad moment will you,' Rufus asked.

'No if it involves a speech,' Dan smirked.

'Fine,' Rufus said as he opened the door to Dan's new dorm room, 'hmmm,' he whispered as he glanced around the small room. Twin beds ran along either side of the room, with a small wooden desk at the centre of the far wall. There were two closets at the end of each bed which were tiny. The room lacked colour and natural light. Also missing was Dan's roommate.

'Well, it's clean,' Dan murmured.

'Son,' Rufus began but was cut of quickly by Dan.

'Dad, we talked about this. I don't need you to pay extra for me to have a nicer room, this is fine,' Dan insisted.

Rufus raised his eyebrows, but didn't say anything. Unfortunately, his son had inherited his own stubbornness. However, Rufus felt slightly proud that his son, somehow managed to remain the same, despite his close contact with the Upper East Side's elite.

'I'm proud of you son,' Rufus said simply. Dan didn't reply, just smiled back at his father. Despite everything, they would always be Humphrey men.

'How about we get you settled in, and then take a tour of the area. See if we can find the best coffee cart?' Rufus suggested.

'Sounds good Dad,' Dan replied.

'No way!' Blair gasped when she opened the door to her room.

'Blair!' Georgina squeaked as she bounced across the common room, 'you're here. Are you surprise?' She wrapped her hands around the brunette's neck.

'Um, I'm sorry. What are you doing here?' Blair asked.

'I'm your roommate,' Georgina stamped her feet with excited.

'Oh no. No, no you are not,' Blair shook her head.

'This isn't happening,' Chuck muttered, 'you can't share a room with her.'

'Oh Chuck! Why not?' Georgina asked, 'It's not like I'm doing this to steal you back away?'

'You never had me Georgina,' Chuck retorted.

'Well I did. For a full three minutes, if I recall correctly,' Georgina teased.

Chuck glared but did not respond. Blair was seething mad. How could she be here? This was her fresh start. She'd have to get another room now. No. She wouldn't. She was Blair Waldorf. She would find away to force Georgina out.

'This is not happening Georgina,' she glanced around the room, 'have you already unpacked?' She screeched.

'Well, yeah, I've been so excited about today that I couldn't sleep. I got up early and was here before anyone else,' Georgina bounced around as she talked.

'You planned this?' Blair accused.

'Hardly,' Georgina lied, 'It's just a happy coincidence.'

'Happy?!' Blair yelled, 'Happy?! I am not happy with this?'

'Oh Blair, why not?'

'Why not?' Blair's voice got louder, 'Last year? You think I can just forget the hell you put poor Serena through? Or how about your past antics with Chuck? Or the fact that you're not claiming to be some bible loving hippy. If I stay in this room you'll either kill or convert me.'

'Blair,' Georgina sighed, 'doesn't it get exhausting being you? Always accusing. Always Plotting. Hell I bet your mind is already working on a way for you to become queen bee of NYU.'

'I don't need a plan Georgina. Where I go, people follow,' Blair shot Georgina a look that kill, 'my only plan right now is to get you out.'

'Why?' Georgina pressed, 'Afraid I'll still your groupies? I mean without Serena here, you must have thought you would be able to dominate within days, not now though. Now you're afraid.'

'Afraid?' Blair took a step towards Georgina, 'Blair Waldorf doesn't do scared. You wanna live here, that's fine. Stick around G. We'll see who wins.'

Georgina smiled, and Blair smiled back. Blair had conquered high school. She could handle Georgina.

'Blair,' Chuck whispered fiercely, 'You cannot be serious. This is Georgina we're talking about.'

'I know Chuck,' Blair took his arm and pulled him away, 'but I'm not giving up this room. I'm not letting her win.'

'You're in College now, aren't you a bit old for these games?' Chuck accused.

'Chuck, look at our world. No matter what age we are, there will always be games. Better to play, and then loose,' Blair turned to Georgina, 'just because we have to co-exist in this room does not make us friends.'

'Whatever you say B,' Georgina smirked.

'Only my friends call me B,' Blair warned, 'Chuck and I are going to take a walk, my mother has organised for Dorota and some of her assistants to come and unpack. Will you please let them in?'

'Of course,' Georgina assured.

Blair narrowed her eyes, 'and don't try anything. You hear me?'

'Blair,' Georgina sighed, 'I really hope we can be friends.'

'You and everyone else want to be my friend,' Blair muttered, 'that's why I get to be queen.'


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3.**

'Urghhh!' Blair screeched as she walked hand in hand with Chuck, 'Georgina! Georgina is in my room. No, Georgina is sharing my room. I am roommates with all that is evil, packed into one Jesus loving freak.'

'Evil cannot exist in a Jesus loving freak,' Chuck smirked.

'How are you helping? How are you not freaking out?' Blair moaned.

'Because this is a non-issue,' Chuck assured her.

'A non-issue? Chuck, the girl who stole your virginity is living with me,' Blair stopped in her tracks, 'the girl who almost destroyed Serena is living in my room.'

'It's a non-issue because it does have to be your room,' Chuck glanced deep into Blair's eyes in a way that may her feel as if she could read everyone of her thoughts. She felt completely exposed when he looked at her like that, but at the same time, completely safe.

'Chuck,' Blair whispered, 'we've talked about this, we're not ready to live together.'

And just like that, Chuck's face changed into a snarl.

'You were willing to live with Nate,' he accused.

'That was different,' Blair explained, 'besides it's not like it worked out between us.'

Chuck frowned but offered nothing else.

'Chuck,' Blair begged, 'it took us forever to get here. I don't want to ruin things because we didn't tread carefully. Please?'

Chuck looked into her vulnerable eyes.

'Ok,' Chuck agreed, 'but the second she attempts something, anything, you sound the alarm, and we go to war together.'

Blair smiled, 'Just like old times. I have Chuck Bass in my army.'

'I thought it was our army,' Chuck said.

Blair laughed, 'You wish.'

'Chuck! Blair!' Blair and Chuck looked over to see Dan and Rufus Humphrey approaching them. Blair had to stop her eyes from rolling. The one good thing about not going to Yale was not being forced to share the same air as Dan Humphrey, and now even that was gone. She hoped he had enough sense to not try and create some friendship out of a few moments from their time at high school.

'Rufus,' Chuck extended his hand. Unlike Blair, Chuck had grown to like Rufus, and tolerate Dan. He knew all too well the pain of not having family. Lily was all he had, and he would befriend anyone to keep that connection alive, 'Daniel. I trust your enjoying you first day?'

'I am,' Dan replied, feeling like he was rehearsing lines in a play. Pleasantries between him and Chuck were always forced, 'Waldorf,' he nodded at Blair.

'Humphrey. Rufus.' Blair forced a smile.

'We heard from Serena last night,' Rufus forced conversation, 'she is doing well at Brown. It sounds like she is fitting in without any trouble.'

'I would expect nothing less,' Blair responded trying not to show her disgust in Rufus's plaid shirt.

An awkward silence followed. Blair looked around her, barely disguising her boredom.

'Well,' Dan began eager to get out of the wrath of Blair Waldorf, 'we should be going. I want to see if my roommate's arrived.'

'Of course, you have a lot to do today,' Chuck nodded.

'I do. Good luck Blair. I'll see you round,' Dan nodded.

'You too,' Blair began to walk away, 'Rufus. Always a pleasure.'

'You too Blair,' Rufus frowned trying not to scold the girl for her manners.

'Daniel,' Chuck took a step forward, 'I think there is something you should know.'

'About Serena?' Dan immediately asked.

'No, Georgina,' Chuck muttered.

'You've seen her?' Dan asked.

'Wait. You knew she was here?' Chuck asked.

'Well, she said she might be,' Dan explained, 'when she returned Dad's money.'

'What,' Blair turned in disbelief, 'you didn't think to warn me.'

'I told Serena,' Dan stated, 'I assumed she'd tell you.'

'Well she didn't,' Blair said, 'She's too wrapped up in her Carter love bubble to even think of others. How could you not think to warn me?'

'I told you, I assumed Serene would tell you,' Dan promised, 'Why? What's the big deal?'

'The big deal is that Georgina is my roommate and set on ruining my college experience,' Blair stated.

'What?' Dan asked, 'You're kidding.'

'If you had told me then I could have stopped it. This is your fault,' Blair muttered.

'Blair, come on. Dan never met for this to happen. I'm sure if you talk to the housing administrators they can set you up elsewhere,' Rufus intervened.

'Oh, forget it!' Blair cried, 'Thanks again, Humphrey.' Blair stormed off. Chuck stood feeling uneasy and embarrassed.

'I apologise,' he said, 'It's been an...interesting...morning for Blair.'

'Well, I probably should have at least told you,' Dan said.

'It's not your fault. No one can predict Georgina. I didn't mean anything by bringing it up, Daniel. I just wanted to warn you to be on guard,' Chuck assured.

'Well, thanks Chuck. I appreciate it,' Dan smiled.

'Does Vanessa know?'

'She does.'

'Good,' Chuck felt awkward bringing up Vanessa with Dan. Dan loved Vanessa, and Chuck had slept with her and tossed her aside like the other girls, 'wish her well here for me.'

Dan's face hardened slightly, but her refrained from saying anything.

'We should go,' Rufus said.

'Right,' Chuck agreed, 'I'll call soon.'

'Take care Chuck,' Rufus tugged Dan away.

'Well,' Rufus began, 'That was interesting.'

'To say the least,' agreed Dan.

'Georgina?' Rufus asked, 'were you going to tell me?'

'Dad,' Dan stopped walking, 'It's a non issue. Georgina, well she's harmless now. I'm more worried about being here with Blair.'

'Yeah,' Rufus agreed, 'she's not the nicest is she?'

'She makes Georgina look like a harmless kitten.'

'Dan! Georgina!' Blair yelled, 'Why? Why? Why can I not rid myself of these incompetents?'

'Georgina I get,' Chuck agreed, 'but Dan not telling you was not his fault.'

'How can you say that?' Blair asked.

'Blair, if he had called to warn you, would you have been grateful? Honestly?'

Blair didn't answer.

'Blair,' Chucked began, 'You've given Dan nothing but a hard time since he stepped on the scene with Serena two years ago. Enough already. This isn't high school. No one will care about how much money you have or what shoes you are wearing. It'll be what you bring to the table.'

'You're defending Dan Humphrey? You want me to be friends with him?' Blair asked in disbelief.

'No, I'm just saying, cut him some lack. This is his college experience too. Don't go ruining it because you think his responsible for your being stuck with Georgina,' Chuck smiled, 'I know you Blair, I can see in your eyes. You were plotting.'

Blair sighed, 'Fine. Dan I'll leave. I'll pretend he doesn't exists. Shouldn't be hard since his a waste of space to me anyways,' she smirked, 'but Georgina is another story.'

'Agreed,' Chuck reached for Blair's hand, 'Come on college girl. Let's go to dinner.'


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4.**

The first three weeks of College had not gone well for Blair. Chuck was right. People didn't care how much money you hand or what shoes you wore. If they had then Blair would not be spending her Friday night alone in her room, with no one to go out with. Chuck was in Seattle on business. Blair considered going home, but Dorota had taken the weekend off, meaning she would have to look after herself. Blair flopped on her bed, exhausted from classes, exhausted from trying unsuccessfully to make friends. It was like they didn't even care that she could help them. She could make them better. She was also sick of not seeing Chuck. He was always busy with work, and she rarely saw him. Even their recent phone calls had been brief.

'Blair,' Georgina interrupted her thoughts, 'what are you doing here?'

'What did I tell you about talking to me?' Blair muttered without lifting her head.

'Sorry,' Georgina whispered, she and Blair had barely spoken a word in their time together, 'I just figured you'd be out with Chuck or something.'

'His in Seattle,' Blair responded.

'Oh,' Georgina said as she smoother her clothes in front of the mirror, 'So why not go out and have fun without him. You know, girls night or something?'

'Because,' Blair answered, 'I don't want to.' She didn't want to admit to Georgina that there was no one else for her to see. Serena was still yet to come home to visit and all her high school friends had not even bothered to contact her since graduation. Georgina on the other hand, had made lots of friends. She'd even somehow wormed her way into Dan and Vanessa's good books again.

'Blair,' Georgina whispered, 'Did.... did you want to come to rooftop party tonight? With Vanessa, Dan and I?'

Blair cringed, 'I could think of nothing I'd rather do less.' How dare she, Blair thought, I'm not a charity case. Blair Waldorf made her own friends.

'Ok, so sit here feeling sorry for yourself all night,' Georgina stated, 'Blair you haven't gone out with anyone since starting here.'

'That's hardly true!' Blair shouted.

Georgina didn't answer, she simply looked at her.

'Besides, you think I'd be caught dead hanging with you three? I'm Blair Waldorf!' Blair stated.

'And who is Blair Waldorf at NYU? No one cares B. Maybe if you were see socialising people would want to get to know you for you, not your name,' Georgina told her, 'You know Dan has gotten on well here. A lot of people like him.'

Blair rolled her eyes. She hated that Dan was doing so well. It wasn't fair. Everyone knew him and loved him just because he had some stupid story published in the New York Times. She had one class with him, and he just thrived. He could handle himself, and he could do it with ease. As Blair thought about it she found herself growing angry. He was probably bad mouthing her to everyone. Everyone probably knew about her failed attempts to get into Yale, and her scandal with the two best friends, and her pregnancy scare.

Well, she thought, I'll have to take him down.

'Ok G,' Blair oozed false sincerity, 'You win. I'll come to this party with you and the others.'

Keep your friends close and your enemies closer. If Dan was on the inside, Blair would use him as her ticket in, and then put him right back where he belonged.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

'Georgina, you're late,' Vanessa said, 'Everything o-,'

Vanessa stopped instantly when Blair followed her into Dan's rooms.

'Hi,' Blair smiled at Vanessa.

'Blair,' Vanessa said slowly, 'what are you doing here?'

'Well, Georgina invited me,' Blair said.

'Oh she did?' Vanessa glared at Georgina.

'Come on V. We're in college. Aren't we too old for all this?' Georgina asked.

Vanessa was seething mad. Blair had tried to humiliate her and all those she love a hundred times over.

'Vanessa, please,' Blair asked, 'I just want a clean slate. I apologise, for all of it.' Blair could feel herself screaming inside as she said these things. As if she apologises to Brooklyn girl! She took Nate from her. And then Chuck. Taking a deep breath she continued, 'I'm really happy that everything between you, I, Nate and Chuck worked out in the end.'

Vanessa was no fool, 'Blair if you mean that, I appreciate it. But be warned, I weary.'

'That's fair,' Blair replied then smiled as she added, 'I hope I can earn your trust the way Georgina has.' That's right, Blair thought, it you want to forgive her then you'll have to forgive me.

'Ok,' was all Vanessa answered.

Silence followed.

'Where's Dan?' Blair piped up, 'This is his room isn't it.'

'It is,' Vanessa confirmed, 'His just down the hall.'

'So his roommate never showed up?' Georgina asked.

'No,' Vanessa replied, 'apparently this Scott guy decided to wait till after the holidays.'

'So lonely boy's still lonely,' Blair laughed. Vanessa shot her a look was not impressed. 'Relax V. I was joking. Besides, it's not like Dan is having any trouble here.'

'That's true,' Vanessa agreed.

'What's true?' Dan asked as he entered the room, 'Whoa! Blair, you ok?'

'Of course, why?' Blair frowned.

'You're in my room. Standing next to Georgina. Adjacent to Vanessa. And you're not drunk. You're not are you?' Dan asked.

'No Humphrey, I'm not,' Blair sighed, 'Georgina invited me and I thought it would be... fun.' Blair smiled.

'Fun?' Dan asked.

'That's right, fun,' Blair replied.

Dan frowned then shrugged. He was friends with Georgina now so attending a party with Blair Waldorf would only reaffirm the craziness that was college.

'Ok,' Dan clapped his hands, 'ladies, let's go.'

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

Two hours later, Blair Waldorf was drunk.

The roof party had been completely absurd, and Blair found the only way to deal with the people around her was by seeking as many of the cheap beers as she could. Being only ninety pounds meant that it only took a couple before the people around her were easy to deal with.

'So you went to school with Dan,' a girl whose name Blair was almost sure was Cassie asked.

'I did,' Blair replied, 'He...he dated my best friend.' Blair slurred.

'Oh, was he always brilliant,' Cassie asked glancing over at Dan who stood talking to Vanessa.

'Brilliant?' Blair frowned, 'Dan and I, well we struggle to see eye to eye. We're completely different.'

'I can't imagine Dan not getting along with anyone,' Cassie sighed, 'His wonderful.'

Blair shot a look at Cassie, 'Oh my god, you like him? Cassie, come on. I mean you're from LA. Your dad is a major producer. You could have anyone.'

'I want Dan,' Cassie sighed, 'I mean his perfect.'

'Perfect' Blair snorted.

'His handsome,' Cassie argued.

'Well, his not totally unattractive,' Blair agreed.

'His smart.'

'Well yeah, he's a scholarship student,' Blair muttered, 'he has to be.'

'What repulses you about him?' Cassie asked.

'His from Brooklyn,' Blair stated.

'That's it?'

'That's everything,' Blair said.

Cassie shook her head, 'If he was born and raised on the Upper East Side, would you have dismissed him at a first glance. I mean you said before he was handsome and smart, what if he had money?'

'I guess, maybe,' Blair stopped, realising the hole she was digging upon seeing the disgusted look on Cassie's face. This was not a good conversation to be having when you're trying to get in the inner circle. _People here love Dan, _she told herself. _You need to like him too. _

'You're right Cassie,' Blair agreed. 'You know for too long I care about the wrong things about people. I'm glad that college has given me a chance to fix this. I'm sure I'll be rewarded with meeting many interesting people such as you.'

Cassie smiled, clearly falling for Blair's lie. Blair felt like she was going to vomit, she had to get away from Cassie.

'I need a drink,' Blair stood and made her way to the keg. The boy who had been managing the keg all night lay passed out next to it. Blair frowned; she had no idea how to work a keg.

'Need a hand?' Dan asked, coming up behind her.

'Oh,' Blair looked at the keg, 'do you mind?'

'Not at all,' Dan poured each of them a drink, 'You having a good night?'

'The best,' Blair lied.

'Liar,' Dan stated, 'You hate it.'

'I don't want to,' Blair admitted, 'why's it so easy for you Dan?'

'It's not Blair,' Dan said, 'stop trying to impress everyone. Just be you.'

'I don't know how to be,' Blair moaned, the alcohol taking more and more of an effect on her mind.

'Yes you do. Remember that time that we were in the hall, at the fashion shoot?'

Blair nodded; she couldn't believed she allowed herself to be so vulnerable.

'You were amazing,' Dan whispered, 'because you let yourself be.'

Blair looked at him wide eyed, 'why are you telling me this?'

'Because,' Dan shrugged, 'it's true. And I'm a little hammered,' he laughed.

'Join the club,' Blair raised her now empty cup.

'Another round?' Dan asked.

It was around 1.00am when Dan realised he knew no one left at the party. Vanessa had left to go see Nate. Georgina had disappeared with some guy. And he assumed Blair had finally had her fill and gone hope. Dan decided it was time for him to go too.

'Dan,' Cassie called after him, 'are you leaving?'

Cassie stumbled over clearly suffering the effects of her drinking.

'Yeah, I think my night's over,' Dan smiled, 'It was good to see you though Cassie.'

'Dan,' Cassie whispered, attempting to be seductive but coming off rather silly, 'Can I come home with you?'

'What?' Dan asked.

'You heard me,' Cassie whispered moving closer.

'Cassie,' Dan took a step back, 'I like you. But not in that way,'

Cassie's shoulders dropped, 'I figured as much,' she mused, 'its Blair.'

'What?' Dan almost fell to the ground, 'No. No. No. Blair and I..... well we're not, anything.'

Cassie raised her eyebrows, 'you don't feel anything?'

Dan shook his head ignoring Cassie's remarks, 'No. I'm sorry Cassie. Have a good night.'

Dan wandered out onto the stairwell. It was dark in the stair well; one of the lights must have been knocked out. Dan could barely walk due to the alcohol; the darkness was making it near impossible. He tripped over something, or someone.

'Oh shit!' he muttered as he landed on the ground.

'Ow,' a female voice replied.

'Blair?' Dan looked closely to see Blair curled up on the ground, 'I thought you left?'

'I did,' she slurred.

'Well you didn't do too greater job of it,' Dan giggled, 'here.'

Dan stood and pulled Blair to her feet, 'I'll take you home. Where are your keys to your place?'

Blair looked at him puzzled, 'I didn't bring them.'

'What? Why not?'

'Georgina had her keys, she can let me in,' Blair told him.

'She's not at home. She went to some guys place,' Dan groaned.

'Ew,' Blair sighed as she leant her head against Dan's neck.

'Ok,' Dan tried to think, 'You can stay at mine.'

Blair sighed but didn't object. Dan took it as an ok and began to drag her back to his room. Thankfully his dorm wasn't too far. He gently lay Blair down on the opposite bed, and removed her shoes. As he placed a blanket over her, he found himself mesmerised by the brunette. He had never stopped to just look at her. She was beautiful. He couldn't deny that. She was delicate. Serena was always strong. But with Blair there was vulnerability. Like she needed to be looked after. He shook his dead. _For Christ sake, _he argued with himself, _this is Blair Waldorf. _He walked over to his bed and lay down. Even with his eyes closed, he could still see Blair's face.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

Blair woke up with a pounding headache. Her throat felt sore and dry. Her stomach felt queasy. Most disturbing, Blair did not wake up in her room.

'Shit,' she bolted up right, 'ohhhh,' she groaned when she realised where she was and what had happened.

'Oh it's not so bad,' Dan smirked as he walked over from his desk, a glass of water in his hand, 'Drink. Take.' He said as he placed the glass and two aspirin in on the table.

'You brought me here?' Blair asked in disbelief.

'You told me to,' Dan reminded her.

'Right,' Blair swallowed the water and tablets and collapsed back down in the bed, 'How are you not more hung over?'

'I don't know,' Dan said, 'I had a paper to write today, so mind over matter I guess.'

Blair closed her eyes and didn't answer. Dan turned back to his desk and continued to work. Several minutes passed before Blair sighed, 'I should go,' she admitted, but made no attempt to move.

Dan laughed, 'There's no rush.'

'I can't move,' Blair muttered, 'It hurts too much.'

'Go to sleep for a little longer,' Dan suggested, 'I don't mind.'

Blair didn't want to admit how nice that idea sounded. Truth was, sleeping in Dan's room was the safest she felt since she'd moved to college. Even though she didn't particularly like Dan, she knew he would do the right thing by her. That's the kind of guy he was. He did the right thing. So she closed her eyes and listened to Dan tap on the keys of his key board. Much time passed before Blair heard Dan's printer going. She sat at that stage, figuring it was time to go. She had dinner with Chuck.

'You going?' Dan asked.

'Yes,' Blair responded as she placed on her shoes, 'I have a dinner with Chuck.'

'How's that going? You and Chuck?'

Blair frowned, 'Fine. Thank you.'

'I wasn't trying to pick a fight with you Blair. I was honestly just wondering,' Dan protested against Blair's tone.

'I'm sorry,' Blair whispered, 'hangovers bring out the bitch in me. That and everything else.'

Dan laughed, 'I think the safest response to that comment is no response.'

Blair laughed, but immediately stopped. Was she really having fun with Dan Humphrey? _No, _she told herself, _you're just lonely and he is only person on campus who has been nice to you. Remember, you need him to get on the inside, then his gone._

'Thanks for last night Dan. I actually had an okay time,' she stood, 'but I should be off.'

'No worries Waldorf, I'll see you round,' Dan replied.

As Blair left the room Dan stood and sat where she had slept. He could still smell her. She smelt... romantic. How he imagined those old movie stars would smell. He thought about what Cassie had said last night. Could he have feelings for Blair Waldorf? He had never thought about her as anything else but Serena's friend. How was he thinking of her now?

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

'I believe this is called the walk of shame,' Georgina smirked as Blair entered their room.

'No shame,' Blair told her as she crossed over to her bed, 'I forgot my keys so I just stayed at Dan's.'

'Oh, just stayed at Dan's?' Georgina queried.

'What?' Blair asked.

'Blair, I like Dan. I actually feel bad about how I used him last year. His one of the good ones,' Georgina began.

'If you're trying to say something Georgina just say it,' Blair muttered.

'His trying to be nice to you because he knows what it's like to be on the outer,' Georgina said, 'your being nice because you want back on the inner. When you're in, will you still be nice to him?'

Blair didn't answer.

'Blair, I'm serious. Before you cut him off, get to know him,' Georgina insisted, 'you might find something worth tolerating him for.'

'I have a dinner with Chuck tonight,' Blair whispered.

'Well I won't keep you,' Georgina said, and promptly left the room.

Blair sighed and began to get ready for dinner. She wasn't exactly being mean to Dan. She had already resolved last night that once she was in she wouldn't cast him out. She may not even rule out being his friend altogether. _Stop thinking about him, _She snapped at herself.

RING RING. Her phone vibrated on her bed, forcing her back to the present.

'Chuck,' she answered, 'are you back in New York?'

'Not exactly,' Chuck replied, 'I'm still in Seattle. I probably won't be home till next week.'

'What?' Blair sighed, 'Chuck, you promised.'

'I know Blair; no one is more upset then me at the moment.'

'You're always cancelling, how long is this going to go on?' Blair asked. It wasn't the first time he'd cancelled and it wouldn't be the last. Blair had forced herself not to ask how much longer this would go on. The truth was that this would keep happening. As long as Chuck worked for Bass Industries, which would most likely be forever. How long could Blair keep doing this? Going weeks without seeing him? Waiting around for him while he took long calls? Being cancelled on at the last minute?

'Blair,' Chuck began, 'I thought you understood that this is what I need to do.'

Blair went silent for a moment before answering, 'I do.'

'Ok, look can we talk more on when I'm home,' Chuck asked.

'Whatever you want,' Blair whispered as she hung up.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

Blair didn't want to stay in her dorm room all night. She didn't want to be alone. She knew where she wanted to go. Somewhere where she wouldn't be alone. She pulled on a pair of jeans and her Ralph Lauren sweater and left the room. She had no idea where she was going but she didn't care. It was still light out as she roamed the streets. Summer was definitely coming to a close. The nights were getting colder, Blair noticed. A new season had started. She came across a bar, meant for students of NYU. She sighed, and wandered inside. Propping herself at the bar she order a martini and allowed herself to be overcome with emotion, although she didn't let it show on the outside. Everything was becoming too much. She missed high school. She missed Serena. She hated that she was an outsider at college. But most of all she hated her relationship with Chuck. She had spent all last year asking him to love her. She felt like she was still asking. There was always something that stopped him from letting himself just be with her. She never felt worthy.

'Is that the saddest girl holding a Martini?' a voice behind her asked.

'Dan,' Blair startled, 'What are you doing here?'

'I was walking by, and I saw you,' he told her, 'I thought you were with Chuck tonight?'

'He had to work,' she whispered.

'Oh,' Dan replied.

'Where are you off to?' Blair asked.

'I was just walking around,' Dan told her as he pulled out a chair.

'What are you doing?' Blair asked.

'I'm joining you,' Dan said, 'If that's ok?'

'Why?' Blair asked.

'Why?'

'Why are you so dam nice Humphrey?' Blair muttered, 'I spent two years putting you down, making digs at everything from your hair to your home location. I was horrible to Jenny. At times even Serena! I made up a rumour about the affair with Rachel that could have cost your future. And you've always been nice to me. Even with the Rachel thing. You told me about how she was sabotaging me in the end. Why?'

'Blair,' Dan began, 'make no mistake. I don't always agree with your choices. Rumour spreading and plotting against people are not my thing.'

'So why are you always nice?' Blair asked again.

'I think because I respect you. You are born into privileges Blair, I don't deny that. But I've seen you work hard. You work hard for everything you've got. Nothing has ever just fallen into your lap,' Dan told her, 'just as it hasn't for me.'

Blair shook her head, 'Humphrey, we're not friends. We never have been.'

'That was because of school, and the whole social order thing. If we wanted to we could be. I want to Blair, if you do,' Dan said, 'I mean we keep running into each other. Running in the same circles, so we may as well try.'

'I was using you,' Blair suddenly said, 'or I was. I just wanted to fit in here, and you were the only one I could use as a ticket in. That's why I came out last night.'

'I know,' Dan said, 'I'm not an idiot. Scholarship student, remember? I need to be smart.'

'Then why?' Blair asked, not even acknowledging his attempt to be funny.

'I was an outsider for my whole life Blair. If I can make someone feel less of an outsider, I will. Even if they have no interest in me,' Dan said.

Blair couldn't believe it. How could she have gone the past two years without seeing this side of Dan? Or appreciating this side of Dan? The kind sensitive guy that could see in her what she'd always wanted people to see. He saw how she tried. That it wasn't always easy for her. Suddenly Blair found herself leaning forward and kissing Dan. Dan was shocked, but he kissed back. They kissed softly but passionately. Dan cupped her face with his hand, wanting to feel her delicate skin. She pressed her hands on his chest, wanting to fall into him.

'Blair,' Dan whispered as he pulled away, 'we can't.'

Blair shook her head, 'I'm sorry Daniel,' she grabbed her purse and dashed out of the bar. Tears formed in her eyes, she was so lost and kissing Dan was the first time she's felt happy. At the same time she felt angry for allowing herself to become so vulnerable to him. What was she doing? Did she really have feelings for Dan Humphrey? She knew the answer. She did. He was everything her life lacked at the moment. Commitment, tenderness, passion and kindness. She was everything she couldn't have.


	6. Chapter 6

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: **I just wanted to say a big thank-you to everyone who has been reading and reviewing this story. Yes, this is my first fan fic and I was absolutely petrified to publish it but I am so glad I did. Reading the lovely reviews and messages has been a real encouragement. I was really surprised at the amount of people who quickly listed this as one of their favourite stories.

I'm going to publish chapters 6, 7 and 8 tonight but unfortunately that may be it for the next week or so. I'm really sorry but university is coming to the end of the year for me and that means assignments are coming out of my ears. I promise to update the story ASAP, and then I have the entire summer (I'm aussie BTW so summer is about here!) to finish **The Freshmen **and work on the other stories that are sloshing around in my mind.

So please don't be disheartened at my lack of updating as I assure you I will be back by the end of the month. Enjoy these three chapters and please let me know what you think.

**CHAPTER 6**

She ran to her dorm and straight to her room. Once inside she threw herself on the bed. She wasn't crying anymore. She was angry. Furious. What was happening? She felt like everything was spinning out of her control. She stood very slowly from her bed and began to search around the room. Hunting. She stalked over to Georgina's side of the room and rummaged through her cupboard. Chocolates. She pulled them from the shelf and took them over to her bed. Sitting in the middle of the mattress she slowly began to open each chocolate, one at a time, and placing them in her mouth. It wasn't long before the box was gone. She looked down at the empty box, the littered rappers. She felt worse. Fat and guilty. She knew what she had to do. She drifted across the hall to the toilets and leant over the bowl. Her porcelain goddess. It didn't take much to bring it all back up.

Georgina returned home to find her cupboards opened and clearly gone through. Blair was nowhere to be seen. Her bed was strewed with the box and wrappers. Georgina frowned and wandered over to the bathroom. Quietly she snuck inside. She was barely two steps in before she heard the gags, retching.

Georgina turned on her heel, and smiling to herself she walk quietly out of the building.

Dan stood in the middle of his room. Should he call her. No. Should he see her. No. What should he do? _Christ! _He thought, _I just kissed Blair Waldorf. _How could he face her? How could he face Serena? How could he face Chuck? His family!

KNOCK KNOCK!

Not feeling like company Dan dragged himself the room and opened the door.

It was Georgina.

'Georgina, now is not a really good time,' Dan began.

'I know. I'm sorry, but if it wasn't an emergency I wouldn't be intruding?' Georgina said.

'An emergency?' Dan asked, 'What's wrong?'

'Dan, you're a good guy. I know things between you and Blair are..... tensed, to say the least?' Georgina began.

Dan's ears pricked up at the sound of Blair's name, 'What's wrong?'

'Did you know about her Blair's past?'

'Which part?' Dan asked. There was a lot to Blair past.

'Her health, the bulimia,' Georgina asked. Serena had let it slurred once to Georgina that Blair had began the nasty habit of bringing up her meals.

Dan knew too, 'I had some idea. Why?'

'I think, it's returned,' Georgina told him.

'You think?'

'I know.' Georgina confirmed, 'I just heard her. And when I looked in our room, it was covered it chocolate wrappers. It may have only been the once but its one time too many. Dan she's miserable. She's not fitting in. Her and Chuck are always fighting.'

'What?' Dan questioned, he thought everything was perfect between Blair and Chuck, 'I thought they were ok?'

'Dan, he hasn't seen her since the first day of college. His away on business all the time,' Georgina told him, 'come on Dan; you know that those two would never make it without the games.'

Dan shook his head, 'but why are you telling me?'

'The only people I know in Blair's world are Serena, who hates me and Chuck who hate's me,' Georgina reminded him, 'They'd think I was up to something. I can't even confront Blair, she'd get defensive. I get the feeling she'd trust you.'

'Why? Blair and I....we....,' Dan couldn't finish that sentence. He didn't know what Blair and he were.

'Dan, despite what she says, I think she likes you. I think you like her, I mean why else would you guys fight the way you do, it's chemistry,' Georgina said, 'Whether or not you choose to act on it. It's there. Anyone can feel it.'

'What are you saying Georgina?' Dan asked defensive, 'are you being genuine right now? Is Blair really in trouble or is this one of your tricks?'

'Dan,' Georgina rushed to save herself, 'I'm sorry. I am genuinely worried. Can you just speak to Blair for me? Please? I'll never forgive myself if this does evolve and I didn't at least try to help her out.'

'Ok Georgina, I'll talk to her first thing in the morning,' Dan agreed.

'And if you could not tell her I asked. I think she'll feel safer if it's only you.'

'Sure,' Dan agreed. Only he was not sure if Blair would trust him.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

As Georgina headed back to her room, her path was intercepted by Cassie.

'Georgina,' Cassie greeted her.

'Cassie,' Georgina replied, 'did the money go into your account?'

'It did,' Cassie confirmed, 'Geez Georgina, five hundred bucks just to say a few things to Blair and Dan to help set them up? I mean you don't even know if it's going to work.'

Georgina smile like a cat that had just moved in on its prey.

'Trust me Cassie,' Georgina told her, 'it's that easy. All you have to do is plant the seed that there _could _be something going on between them. Before they know it they're questioning everything about their relationship.'

Georgina continued walking on home. It was so easy to fool someone into thinking they had feelings for someone else. You just had get them both thinking it at the same time, and then they take care of the rest. But just in case, Georgina planned to give them a helping hand along the way.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7.**

The next day Dan headed over to Blair's room. He felt nervous, anxious and excited all at once. Excited to see Blair, nervous that she'd be angry at him for stopping the kiss but above all anxious to find out if her bulimia had returned. He took a deep breath and knock on the door. He was half expecting to find Blair still asleep or in tears. However when Blair opened the door she was bright eyed, fully dressed and looking her gorgeous self. _Idiot! _He thought, _she won't waste a day pining over you._

'Daniel,' Blair said coldly, 'What do you want?'

'Is Georgina here,' Dan asked looking around the room.

'She left for class already,' Blair told him.

'Can I come in then?' Dan asked.

Blair hesitated for a second then stepped aside to let him in, 'I don't think we have anything to say to each other,' she said bluntly, 'last night, we can forget it.'

'Can we?' Dan asked sharply.

'It was a kiss,' Blair said.

'Yeah, which you initiated,' Dan shot back.

'You seemed quite willing to kiss me back. Or least you did at first,' Blair told him.

'I was taken by surprise,' Dan began but stopped himself, 'look that's not why I'm here.'

'Oh,' Blair replied sarcastically, 'Just here to say hi?'

'Last night,' Dan began; 'after...everything.... did you.....' he shook his head.

'Did I?' Blair asked.

'Did you binge and throw up?' Dan closed his eyes, hating saying the words.

'What?' Blair whispered, 'Why do you think that?'

'I heard you, and saw the state of the room,' Dan said praying that Georgina was right in her accusations otherwise he'd have some explaining to do.

Blair suddenly found it hard to breath. He had seen? He knew about her disgusting habits? She felt ashamed.

'Get out!' Blair snapped, tears in her eyes, 'What I do is none of your business.'

'It's true?' Dan asked ignoring her demand for him to leave.

Blair glared at him, hatred shooting from her eyes, 'Get out, Cabbage Patch. This has nothing to do with you. If you tell anyone what you saw I will end you. You hear me?'

Dan turned and walked out of the room. He didn't leave the hallway though. It was true. He had hoped that Georgina was playing some sick game, but she wasn't. He closed his eyes and pressed his fingers to his temples unsure of what to do next.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

Blair was furious. With Dan. With herself. With Chuck. She was embarrassed, angry and upset. She wished she hadn't ordered Dan away. She wished he hadn't left so easily. She wished he'd stayed and hugged her and told her it would be ok. That he could fix it. Why did he leave? Did he find her so repulsive now? Why had he stopped kissing her last night? She knew the answer. She wasn't good enough. Blair Waldorf was not good enough for Brooklyn boy. She shook her head in disgust. This was her lowest of lows. Even Dan Humphrey didn't care about her. And he was the person she wanted the most right now.

Sighing she pulled herself together and gathered her books. She opened her door only to find that Dan was still standing there. He gave her a sad smile, and she stood aside and let him back in. Dan took off his bag and Blair placed her books down on the desk. There were no words needed. Dan walked across the room and cupped Blair face in his hand and kissed her. Blair wrapped her arms around him. They kissed for some time, eventually moving to the bed. After a while they parted and just lay staring at the other one.

'I'm sorry,' Dan whispered, 'for pushing you away last night.'

'I shouldn't have kissed you so suddenly,' Blair said.

Dan raised a hand and ran it through her hair, 'I was glad you did.'

'I thought you were repulsed. You pushed me away-' Blair began.

'I was thinking about everyone else....Chuck,' Dan said hesitating to say his name.

'Chuck,' Blair repeated.

'What going on there?' Dan asked.

'I don't know,'

'What's going on here?' Dan asked.

'I don't know,'

'Blair,' Dan asked propping himself up on his elbow and staring so hard into her eyes that she had look away, 'are you bulimic again?'

Blair turned to face away from him, 'It was just the once. I promise.'

Dan stood and walked around to other side of bed, he wasn't going to let Blair turn away. He knelt down in front of her, 'are you ok?'

Blair tried to turn away again but Dan kept his hand firmly on her shoulder.

'Blair,' he begged, 'I want to help.'

Blair looked at him, 'Everything is just so hard and out of my control. I just wanted to be in control again.'

'Making yourself throw up doesn't give you control,' Dan said sternly.

'I know,' Blair sniffed, 'Please. Don't tell anyone.'

'Ok,' Dan agreed, 'but please, talk to me before you feel the need to do that again. You're more than that Blair. You're stronger. You're beautiful.'

Blair sat up and kissed Dan, 'Thank you.' She whispered.

Dan sat next to Blair, 'What do we do now?'

Blair shook her head, 'I don't know. What do you want to do?'

'I don't know,' Dan admitted, 'things are complicated.'

'That's an understatement,' Blair began, 'It's not like we can just be together.'

'Do you want to forget about us?' Dan accused.

'What? No. Dan..' Blair whispered, 'I need time.'

'Time?' Dan almost snorted, 'time away from me?'

'What do you suggest we do Dan?' Blair suddenly got defensive, 'It's not like we can just hold hands and the world will accept us.'

'I know,' Dan whispered hushing her and rested his head against hers, 'I know. I just...' he stopped himself unable to finish what he wanted to say.

'You just what?' Blair asked.

'I just want you. I don't want to have to stay away,' Dan admitted.

'So don't,' Blair told him, 'I want you here too.'

The two kissed again but this time they didn't stop. They reached for the other one's clothes, caught up in the moment and forgetting everyone else. It was a perfect moment for each of them. Blissful and passionate at the same time. A couple of years ago neither of them would have thought this day would ever be possible, but the whole thing felt natural, like they were meant to be together the entire time.


	8. Chapter 8

**CHAPTER 8**

Over the next few weeks the weather got colder, but things between Dan and Blair heated up. Chuck returned home for a week only to have to leave for Australia for another month. Blair faked upset, but secretly she felt relived. She still loved Chuck. Truth be told, there was still a small part of her that wished things could work out between them. However, things with Dan were amazing. She felt so special when she was with him.

It was Friday morning; Blair had spent the night at Dan's. His roommate was still yet to arrive, which meant Blair could stay the night without any hassles. She told Georgina on the nights she stayed with Dan that she was just returning home.

'So I have bad news,' Dan told her.

'It's too early for bad news,' Blair insisted, 'tell me good news instead.'

Dan paused, thrown but Blair's requested, 'Good news is, that I don't have a class for another hour.'

Blair laughed, 'What's the bad news?'

'My roommate is due this afternoon,' Dan told her, 'so we're kinda stuck for sleep-over's.'

'Oh,' Blair replied, 'so he is coming?'

'Yeah,' Dan said, 'I just got a notification from the student housing guys yesterday. Apparently he's name is Scott Peterson. His from Boston, I think.'

'Oh well,' Blair said, 'we'll work something out.'

Dan smiled. He liked when Blair was like this, she was lighter and less stressed. It felt like nothing could ruin her good mood. Of course he wished they could be like this in public, but he knew that that was next to impossible. Blair and he had promised the other one that they'd work something out but deep down he felt that inevitably things would either die down or blow up. Yet there was a part of him that just didn't care. He liked Blair. He couldn't believe that this was the same Blair Waldorf that he once despised.

'So,' Blair queried with an eyebrow raised, 'we have an hour?'

Dan smiled and made his way over to the bed.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

After she left Dan, Blair headed towards the student office to see if any new rooms had become available. She'd decided to throw in the towel and let Georgina have the room. Winning wasn't worth putting up with the horrors of Georgina Sparks. She entered the office but unfortunately there was already someone at the desk. Blair waited patiently behind him.

'So you're in room 247 with Dan Humphrey,' the office assistant told the guy at the desk.

Blair's head snapped up. This was Dan's new roommate.

'Ok,' the guy said, 'and on my enrolment I asked to go by the name of Scott Peterson as opposed to Ronson for personal reasons.'

Blair frowned. Why had Dan's roommate changed his last name?

'Yes that's all taken care of, no one will know your last name apart from administration,' the office assistant confirmed.

Blair quickly snuck out of the office before Scott could see her. Why was this guy changing his name? What did he mean by personal reasons? Sighing she knew she would have to do some research. She didn't want any surprises from Dan's roommate. There was already too much at stake.

She headed back to her room. Georgina wasn't there so Blair was able to do her research in peace. She began searching Scott Ronson. An article came up about a local boy who drowned in Boston. She paused. Was this the brother of Lily and Rufus' son? She did some more research. Something didn't add up. They boy in the article was said to be sixteen when he died. But Lily and Rufus' son would have had to been eighteen years old that year. It didn't make sense.

Blair dug a little deeper. A school newsletter came up with an autobiography of the soccer teams best player, Scott Ronson. Blair scanned through the article until she came across a sentence that sent her heart racing; _Scott Ronson was adopted as a baby..._

Blair couldn't believe it. Dan was sharing a room with his half brother. The brother who his father had tried desperately to look for last year. Obviously Scott didn't want Dan to know or he wouldn't have gone to the trouble of changing his last name. Blair felt sad for Dan and scared for herself. Should she tell Dan?

Sighing, she knew she had to. This was bigger than the two of them. She would go to him after her class and tell him the truth.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

Blair walked, almost ran, straight to Dan's room after her class. She needed to tell him straight away. She knew how important this was to him, his family. She also knew that this could expose things between them when people asked how he found out. However she didn't care. This was more important. She knocked on his door.

Scott answered.

'Hi,' Blair said.

'Hi,' Scott replied, 'can I help you?'

'I'm looking for Dan. I'm a...' Blair stopped herself not knowing how to finish the sentence.

'You're a friend,' Scott asked, Blair just nodded, 'I'm Scott his new roommate.'

'It's nice to meet you, I'm Blair,' Blair said weakly.

'Oh his girlfriend?' Scott asked.

'What?! No,' Blair near screamed.

'I'm sorry,' Scott frowned, 'I was unpacking and I found this make up bag with the name Blair on the inside.' Scott walked across the room grabbing the bag from his desk.

'Oh um,' Blair tried to think of something to say but instead just asked, 'Is Dan here?'

'No his out with Vanessa,' Scott said.

Blair reached for her makeup bag, 'ok,' she began to leave before she turned and sat down on Dan's bed, 'Scott Ronson?'

Scott stopped suddenly and looked at Blair, 'Excuse me?'

'You heard me,' she said, 'that is your name right?'

Scott shook his head, 'No you must be mistaken.'

'How bout you tell me the truth, because I already know it,' Blair told him, 'What are you doing here?'

Scott sat on his bed and looked at Blair, 'I just wanted to see him,' he whispered, 'I just wanted to see them. I deserve to see them.'

'I agree,' Blair said, 'but they deserve to know they are being seen.'

'It's not that easy,' Scott told her, 'They gave me away.'

'Dan didn't,' Blair reminded him, 'and besides Lily and Rufus went looking for you late last year. Your parents said you drowned.'

Scott frowned, 'That was my brother.' He shook his head in disbelief at his parent's behaviour.

'I'm so sorry,' Blair whispered.

They sat in silence for a moment before Blair spoke again.

'Scott, I'm sorry for your loss. I can't imagine how overwhelming this all must be for you. But I can't support you in not telling Dan who you are,' Blair said.

'You're saying that if I don't tell him you will?' Scott glared at her.

'I'm giving you a chance,' Blair said, 'I believe Dan should hear it from you.'

Scott stubbornly shook his head, 'No. I'm not ready.'

'No one's ready to tell a stranger such a thing,' Blair told him.

'If you tell him, I'll run and he'll never see me again. It will be all your fault, 'Scott said suddenly,' you will cost him a brother and his parents a son.'

'What?' Blair whispered in disbelief, 'you're threatening me? I'm trying to help.'

'Help by staying out of it! I'll tell him when I'm ready, until then I recommend you act like this conversation never happened,' Scott snapped.

Blair stood shaking. She couldn't believe she was being out manipulated, especially when she was trying to help. She took one last look at Scott and walked out of the room.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

Blair made her way back to her room, her mind swimming. She did not know what to do. She wanted to get out of the crowds in her hallway and be alone. She needed to think. She pushed open her door and slammed it behind her, slumping against it.

'What's wrong?'

Blair jumped a mile when she heard the familiar masculine yet soft voice.

'Chuck,' she stammered, 'What? ... I thought you weren't back till next week.'

Chuck smiled and made his way to her, pulling her into his arms, 'I had to come back to see you,' he whispered in her ear, 'I missed you.'

Blair squeezed her eyes tight, 'I missed you,' she heard herself say.

He gently tugged her over to the bed where they sat down side by side. He looked in her eyes so deeply that she felt like he would be able to read everything on her mind. She turned away realising that Dan was on her mind, and she didn't want him to sense that.

'What's wrong,' Chucked frowned, 'anyone would think you're not happy to see me.'

'I am,' Blair whispered, 'It's just... you've been gone for so long. Too long.'

'I know,' Chuck said and pulled her in for another hug, 'but I'm here now.'

Blair just allowed herself to be held. It felt nice. For a moment Dan, Scott and NYU were long from her mind.

'Hellllllo!' A voice sung as the door swung open, 'Oh Chuck! Goodness I'm sorry. I didn't realise you were back.' Georgina froze as she entered the room.

Chuck straightened up quickly, 'yes, I've come to take Blair to dinner.'

'Oh how nice!' Georgina smiled making Chuck and Blair both frown. How could long could she keep up this nice girl act for? 'Although I barely see Blair these days, she's been staying at her place so often.' Georgina told Chuck.

Blair stood suddenly and made her way to the mirror busying herself by straightening her makeup.

'Back at the penthouse?' Chuck asked frowning.

'Yes,' Blair responded trying to act like it didn't matter. _Please shut up! Please shut up! _She thought desperately, 'Georgina, what are you up to tonight?' she attempted to change the subject.

'Oh, I'm seeing a movie! With Dan!' Georgina near squealed the last part.

Blair paused, 'Dan Humphrey? Like a date?' she asked.

'Does it matter?' Chuck muttered.

'Well I don't know if I'd call it a date. Maybe,' Georgina smiled coyly.

Blair felt Chuck's eyes on her, 'Ew!' She muttered hoping Chuck wouldn't question her behaviour.

'We should go,' Chuck said, 'Georgina.' He nodded as he pulled Blair out of the room.

Once in the hallway, Chuck turned to Blair, 'What's going on?'

'What do you mean?' Blair asked forcing a smile.

'You seem, different,' Chuck said.

'You've been away for 3 weeks Chuck, I've kept myself busy here at NYU with classes and papers. I'm just a little tired and taken by surprise that you're suddenly here,' Blair hurried to cover her tracks, 'but I'm happy you're here.'

Chuck smiled, clearly taking the bait, 'So dinner, then back to my place?'

Blair suddenly found herself wondering if she had the energy to keep up her pretence all night, 'sounds like a plan,' she said.

'Chuck?' Blair froze at the sound of Dan's voice. _Please, no more tonight! _She thought.

'Daniel,' Chuck extended his hand, 'How's NYU treating you?'

'Um,' Dan shook Chuck's hand, suddenly struggling to find words, 'well. Thank-you. Much different to St Judes. You just got in?'

'Came straight from the airport to see my girl,' Chuck smiled as he pulled Blair towards him. Blair watched as Dan's jaw clenched. His eye's met hers and she looked away quickly.

'Taking her to dinner then?' Dan guessed.

'Yes, he is,' Blair spoke up, 'but I hear that you also have a date with Georgina. That's quite an interesting pick there cabbage patch.'

Dan looked as if Blair had slapped him. It suddenly felt like the last few weeks had been a dream, and Blair had just re-verted back to her old package of girly evil.

'Yes,' he began slowly, 'Georgina and I _and Vanessa _are seeing a movie tonight. We hadn't realised Chuck was back and planned to invite you.' He gave Blair a look that made her feel as if she should have known better. She felt horrible and looked away.

'Well,' Chuck intervened, 'Good to see you two are somewhat getting along. But if you'll excuse us Daniel, we do have a night to spend together.'

Dan stood and watched Blair and Chuck walk hand in hand together down the corridor as they turned the corner Blair looked back at Dan. He raised his eyebrows and shook his head before turning the other way.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10.**

The next morning Chuck dropped Blair back at NYU. The whole night had been exhausting. She managed to avoid sleeping with Chuck by faking a headache. She knew he was disappointed, but she was too tired and confused. Why did she have to pretend with Chuck? Why couldn't she just act normal like the way she normally did? She didn't want to investigate the possibility that she no longer loved Chuck. She refused to believe that the past two years of heartache and plotting were just for a few months of happiness that would be wrecked by Dan. Dan. What did she feel for Dan? And even if she did feel something more for Dan, what could come of it? What would their families think? Family. Scott. How would she deal with what she knew about Scott? She spent the entire morning in her room sitting on her bed and just thinking. She was drained and couldn't bring herself to go to her morning classes. She knew she had to see Dan though, and she brought herself to finally get ready and face him.

Xoxoxoxoxoxoxox oxoxoxoxoxoxoxo xoxoxoxoxo

Dan spent the next morning busying himself with study. He did his weekly readings. Then, next week's readings. He started exam preparation. Around lunch time he finally met his roommate, who he knew had arrive but who he kept missing every time he was in the room.

'Hey,' Scott said as he entered the room, 'I'm Scott, your roommate.'

'Dan,' Dan said as the boys shook hands, 'I was beginning to think you were avoiding me already.'

Scott laughed, 'no, no not at all. Just been really hectic. I have a lot to catch up starting later in the semester.'

'Of course,' Dan nodded, 'I thought you weren't joining us till after the holidays.'

'That was the plan, but my...parents...will be out of the country for Thanksgiving so I didn't want to stay home by myself. I figured something would be happening here that I could attend.'

'Yes, I can imagine you'll find something,' Dan agreed. Thanksgiving was still a couple of weeks away but the parties where already being advertised.

'Hey, so I met your girlfriend the other day. Did she tell you?' Scott asked.

'Girlfriend?' Dan frowned.

'Blair, she came to pick up her makeup bag,' Scott said.

'Oh Blair. Not a girlfriend. She's my friend. We...ah...went to high school together,' Dan shook his head realising as much as he didn't want to admit it, he needed to see Blair, 'actually Scott, I gotta duck out for a bit, but let me know if you need a hand with anything ok?'

'Yeah sure man,' Scott said.

Dan grabbed his coat and headed out the door making his way to Blair's. He didn't care if she got angry at him for just showing up, they needed to talk and they needed to talk now.

He exited the building and almost ran right into her. He stopped and just looked at her. She was wearing a thick grey coat that sat above her needs, with black patterned stockings and black heels. Her hair was half pinned up while the rest of it fell in loose curls. Dan couldn't help but smile a little, realising that he couldn't be angry, though he wanted to be. She smiled back, and for the briefest of moments it was just the two of them, like last night never happened. Dan realised then and there, he didn't want things to end between then. Maybe this morning he thought that they should, but in that moment he knew they shouldn't. What they had was real. He made her happy. He had never seen Blair happy. She was miserable with Nate and Chuck, as she tried desperately to please each of them. She never tried to please him, and that was when he liked her the most. He would fight for them.

Blair stepped forward, 'We can't talk here, gossip girl.'

Dan glanced around, 'my roommate's in my room.'

Blair's smile dropped immediately, 'meet me in my room. Follow me in ten.' She turned and headed back. Dan frowned. He hated sneaking around, but she was right. If they were caught, then the people they loved would be hurt.

When he finally entered her room, he felt lost for words. He knew he wanted to talk to her, but he didn't know what to say. He didn't know what he wanted her to say either.

'So...' he whispered.

'So...' Blair began, 'Chuck... he just showed up.'

'I know,' Dan shook his head, 'it was like...'

'Like what?'

'Like I forgot about him,' Dan sighed, 'I knew you weren't mine. But I forgot you were still his.'

'I'm not property,' Blair frowned, 'I'm me.'

'What are you to me?' Dan asked.

Blair shook her head, 'Dan.' The room fell silent. Blair sat on the bed and Dan sat on the chair across from her, too scared to sit near her. Like the slightest movement would scare her off.

'We can't keep doing this,' Dan whispered.

Blair looked down into her lap. She knew it would come to this eventually. Dan was right; they couldn't just keep sneaking around and pretending like they weren't hurting anyone else. But she didn't know how much it would hurt. She felt tears come into her eyes and she tried to shake them away without Dan noticing.

'Blair,' Dan whispered as he dropped his head to the side, 'please,' he stood up and knelt in front of her, 'there is another option.'

'We can't be together Dan,' Blair sniffed, 'it's not that simple. You know it.

'Why not?' Dan asked, 'Blair, today I thought that we had to end this. But then I realised we don't. Screw everyone else. I just want to be with you. Blair, these past few weeks have been amazing. I'm happy with you; I think you're happy with me.'

'I am,' Blair agreed.

'So..' Dan asked.

Blair felt her heart racing. She didn't know what she wanted. Could you love two people at once? What would people think if she dumped the great Chuck Bass for Brooklyn boy? What would happen if he dumped her? She'd already fallen because of her failure to get into Yale; she wasn't going to fail to top it off by dating Serena's leftovers. She shook her head.

'I'm not ready,' Blair whispered, 'to choose.'

Dan stood again and walked back to the chair, he didn't sit. He stood so he was facing away from Blair. He breathed deeply before turning back, 'I can't wait Blair. I refuse to sit by while you have both me and Chuck. I will not be yours on the side. I will not be what keeps you busy while Chuck's away.'

'You've been happy to do this up until now,' Blair stood suddenly enraged.

'You weren't sleeping with Chuck while we were together,' Dan shot back, 'you and Chuck have barely been together since the semester started.'

'Well that's changed,' Blair said.

'Changed?' Dan glared at Blair, 'you slept with Chuck last night?'

'What do you think? He's my boyfriend Daniel!' Blair said, not sure why she was saying it.

Dan shook his head, 'What was I?'

Blair closed her eyes already hating what was about to come out of her mouth, 'something to do, cabbage patch. I'm sorry if you thought it meant more, but the truth is I was bored and you were something to do.'

Dan took a deep breath, 'Blair, I don't believe you. I know you felt something, and you know what? I get it. You're scared.'

Blair opened her eyes, Dan was calling her bluff? He wasn't giving up? She stood there realising she felt happy that he wasn't giving up on her but scared all the same.

After what felt like an eternity passed Dan walked back over to her, he stared deep into her eyes and when she tried to look away he cupped her chin with his hand, almost so it hurt, 'tell me to leave, and I'll leave. Tell me you love Chuck and that you see yourself happier with him then you'd ever be with me. Tell me Blair, and we can pretend that this week didn't happen.'

Blair stood, staring back into Dan's eyes. They weren't like Chucks. Chuck's eyes searched hers as with arrogance, like he knew exactly what he would find. Dan's eyes searched hers with cautious optimism, hoping for the best but preparing for the worse. She realised that they could never be together. They would never be accepted. And once the drama with Scott unfolds, like drama always did, then things would just get worse, and they wouldn't be strong enough to weather the storm.

'Please leave Dan,' Blair whispered so faintly that she wasn't sure he would hear it.

He did. He released her jaw and turned on his heel, and left without a single glance back.


End file.
